Investment Banking for Idiots

There are 5 professions in Iceland (a land of 300,000 people and 9 family names): fisherman, aluminum smelter, civil servant, elf finder (no kidding) and until recently: financial services professional. The transition from fisherman to investment banker (via elf finding) it seems was EZ in the Iceland of 2003. The thing is, it is far easier to teach fishermen to trade currencies than it is to teach finance geeks to fish, according to people "in the know" in Reykjavík. So, in an Icelandic twist on an old aphorism, "Teach a man to fish, and he becomes an investment banker; give a man a fish and, well.............whatever."

Icelandic Banks

"You have a dog, and I have a cat. We agree that they are each worth $1 billion. You sell me the dog for $1 billion and I sell you the cat for $1 billion. Now we are no longer pet owners, but Icelandic banks with $1 billion (each) in new assets." Michael Lewis, "Wall Street on the Tundra", Vanity Fair, April 2009

Where Have You Gone, Steve McQueen?

I know this post will not ring true with my legion of young female fans, but I feel impelled to point to the "elephant in the room" and say that the matinee idols of today are total WHIMPS compared to those of the Hollywood "hey day". From the 1930's through the 1980's we had guys like:

James Cagney
Edward G. Robinson
John Wayne
James Coburn
Steve McQueen
James Dean
Marlon Brando
Humphrey Bogart
Clint Eastwood
Charleton Heston
Burt Lancaster
Kirk Douglas
Paul Newman
Lee Marvin
Charles Bronson
Sean Connery

..........and the list goes on and on. Even latter day "guys" like Harrison Ford, Scott Glenn, Mel Gibson (in his early days), Mickey Rourke (in his early and not so weird days) and Keanu Reeves (in his early and not so weird days) held out promise. As for Nicholas Cage? Valley Girl, Raising Arizona, Leaving Las Vegas and Wild at Heart were all great films; but the rest of his repertoire (along with that of Bruce Willis and Adam Sandler) justify a new category from the film rating agency: PC (for pure crap)

And while I am a huge fan of Lawrence Olivier and Cary Grant, our beloved "man on horseback", the vagabond from the wild frontier on a mission seems to have devolved into a sensitive dandy, walking a pair (a brace?) of Westy's in Tribeca. When Hollywood portrayed Orlando Bloom as a swashbuckling corsair in "Pirates of the Caribbean" my heart sank. No offense to Orlando. He is a fine actor. But he looked far more like a cabin boy than a buccaneer. Find him a role as a hair dresser in Beverly Hills........and bring back the man on horseback!